Month: August 2004

Okay, I didn’t mention other things I did today. I went parttime job hunting. The application process was very impersonal and made me feel rather stupid. I don’t like doing quizzes like we do here when they really count. I’m always second-guessing the real answers they want based on the way the questions are phrased. It’s a low paying job so, I won’t cry about it.

Anyway, after that business I went to the galleries. On the way home I stopped at a nearby park that sits on one of the bays we have. It was very relaxing.

I am a person that does not like to complain, unless it’s warranted. I don’t get into telling all the tragic events of my life. I am rather self-reflective and, sometimes to the point of not acting or reacting quickly enough to situations. I guess that’s navel-gazing, right? Anyway, I need to be more proactive and use my experience and resourcefulness to dig myself out of my current emotional, physical, and financial situations.

My co-worker, also prof. of photography, was in his office yesterday. We had a long talk about teaching and my frustrations. Of course, he’s got his frustrations with teaching as well. Only difference is, he’s tenured. He knows how to make me feel good. He restated that he wanted me there teaching alongside him. The previous photo prof., my former academic advisor when finishing my BFA, also wanted me here to replace him. Too bad the Dept. Head doesn’t seem to want to fill the position that was left behind. I don’t teach Pre-Colombian Art Hist. (like my previous prof.), but I do other things. I feel so restricted in a way that makes me think this has been a bad career choice.

I can’t plan a single thing in my life past Dec., 2004 and, even up to that time things are tenuous.

I did call my geology prof. to set up some times to do some photos of fossils in his office. I’m excited about finally getting that going. I really want to get that done. I would love to take another course with him. He gets me excited about a very difficult subject. Of course, it helps that he’s very handsome…

Edouard’s studio.

As my cousins were in orientation for parents and students at Univ. of Miami. The youngest daughter wanted to “do something” other sit in some boring meetings so, she asked if we could do something. There were no gallery openings that I knew about so, we up to Ft. Lauderdale and walked up and down Las Olas with all the outdoor cafés and such. We had some ice cream and enjoyed each others company. On the way back we stopped in Hollywood to check out the outdoor happenings near Young Circle. Because she has an art background we have more than a little common ground to interact. She’s really a wonderful girl. I stopped back at the hotel to say goodbye to everyone but, nobody had returned to the hotel yet. I’ll talk to my cousin tomorrow before they leave for home.

My cousin’s family and I went out to dinner last night. We ate at a Haitian place near where I used to live. The food was good and we all got stuffed. If you haven’t tasted caribbean style cooking from the different islands, you must. We are so fortunate in that way here in Miami, top of the caribbean as it is.

My friend Edouard has a few flowering plants in his garden right now. This bromiliad is really awesome.

I have relatives in town today. My cousin’s daughter is, or will be tomorrow, enrolled at the Univ. of Miami (a private institution) and so, the family is here to send their youngest daughter through college. Their older girl already finish her batchelor’s at Auburn. It is strange having family here because none really live here. She’s a beautiful young lady and has her head on straight. She should do well. Anyway, the older daughter wants to go hang out with me tomorrow at some gallery openings. She’s bored and wants something fun to do. 🙂

I don’t know the name of this flowering shrub and, didn’t have time to find out today. It’s in the rear garden area of my artist friend’s studio. I was over his studio today since we hadn’t talked in a couple weeks.

Yesterday, even though I was still feeling ill, I took a long walk. I felt good while walking and saw this car on my return trip. Naturally, it made me think of danthered. I went back this afternoon for the model year: 1960.

I woke up this morning and said as I walked to the bathroom that I am beginning to feel like I never want to wake up again. No, I don’t mean that. What I am feeling, along with my continued illness, is overwhemled by decision of some years ago to teach. There have been some successes and some frustrations but, right now this choice is causing me to find some work that is less tenuous. Being an adjunct, per contract, is not allowing me to reach my goals. Having to do so many things, to find many different income sources, larger and smaller, takes too damn much energy.

I didn’t mention I had a meeting with the Dean of my dept. last week. Our chat was okay. However, one thing I’ve never done but will most certainly in the future is to request a student drop my class if they are a problem. In the past I’ve always tried to keep all students in classes because if the class doesn’t make (the required number for continuing) then, it could possibly be cancelled. That has happened once. The primary reason for doing that is student evaluations of teacher performance. There is a percentage, or range, that is acceptable. In all the classes I’ve had problem students the evaluations are at the bad end of the scale. That has got to be better for me in the long run, however long this run is going to be, because it feeds into the interaction with other students. Those evaluations are as charged with emotion as they are with facts. It’s crazy… anyway, let me go fix some breakfast or something. Well, maybe lunch now that it’s 10am.

One thing about feeling ill when one is used to good health and very few illnesses is that getting ill feels worse than it probably is. I never (rarely) get sick. Last week I started off with a slight irritation in my throat that got worse and then, I started sneezing and runny nose. Today, I’ve been taking meds, drinking tea and resting in bed. I just ate some chicken soup and my stomach feels totally swollen and painful to pressure. Gawd… I’m going back to bed.

I did listen to live audio from today’s Olympic cycling event www.eurosport.com). Handsome Italian Paolo Bettini won the race. I’ve been watching swimming events on TV trying to checking out technique so that I can swim better. I couldn’t swim as fast as them for $10mil, although I’d give it a shot.

I even took a pic of myself for my daily photos that looked about as sick as I felt.. *smile*